Gender-Neutral Pronouns: All of your questions answered

What Are Gender-Neutral Pronouns?

Let’s start with a bit of history…Dating as far back as the works of Shakespeare and Chaucer, there are accounts of ‘they’ being used as a singular pronoun referring to a person who’s gender is not specified. Therefore, the so-called controversy towards the use of gender-neutral pronouns isn’t such a linguistic revolution after all. Hmmm funny that… Reclaiming the singular gender-neutral ‘they’ is essential to ensure inclusivity and to represent the rights of each individual, as well as get away from male dominated gender bias.  

As well as the gendered pronouns ‘he’ or ‘she,’ the English language gives us gender-neutral pronouns like ‘they,’ ‘them.’ These inclusive pronouns can be used for people who do not identify as either male or female or to avoid gender assumptions in a situation where a person’s gender is unknown. However, for many romance languages even the plural third person pronoun is gendered, and what’s worse is in a mixed gendered group, the male form takes preference. However, across the globe we are seeing changes to the linguistic systems of languages and a new gender-neutral form being created and implemented into the grammar systems.

This in itself is a linguistic revolution and a celebration for LGBTQ+ rights as new editions of dictionaries are recognising a third person singular form as a gender-neutral pronoun and education in schools and enterprises are being adapted to teach the new inclusive grammar of languages.

Why Are Pronouns Important?

Pronouns are part of someones identity. Imagine how mortified you would be if you were calling a person repeatedly by the incorrect name- this is the attitude you should give to someones pronouns. Not only that, but the incorrect use of pronouns can be hurtful and disrespectful. Doesn’t take much does it? And if you do accidentally use the wrong pronoun, apologise as recognition that you did not mean to be a dick, and try to get it right the next time.

Naturally, changes to a long ingrained linguistic and grammar system and habits can spark some confusion and uncertainty but this article will address all your burning questions and help you to be the best ally to the LGBTQ+ community.

A Quick Guide to Using Gender-Neutral Pronouns?

1. Using Gender-Neutral Pronouns:
   • They/Them/Theirs: Commonly used and widely accepted. Used for individuals who don’t identify strictly as male or female.
   • Ze/Hir/Hirs: Less common but still valid alternatives.
   • Mx. (Pronounced “mix”): An inclusive honorific instead of ‘Mr.’ or ‘Ms.’
2. Habitualise inclusive language: Language is flexible and has many ways and structures to avoid gender biasing or gender assumption. Incorporate this into your daily speech using inclusive language such as ‘everybody’ instead of ‘ladies and gentlemen’, or ‘parents’ in place of ‘mother and father’.
3. Knowing Someone’s Pronouns:
   • Ask Respectfully: When meeting someone new, politely ask for their pronouns. Moving forward, this should be normalised as part of an introduction.
   • Listen Actively: Pay attention when people share their pronouns, or the pronouns other people use towards a person. Follow suit and use them consistently reflecting their pronouns.
4. Misgendering and Recovery:
   • Apologise: If you misgender someone, apologise sincerely. Correct yourself and move forward.
   • Learn and Adapt: Educate yourself about different pronouns and practice using them.
   • Be an ally: If you notice somebody else using the incorrect pronouns, gently correct them by repeating or reiterating their phrase back with the correct pronoun.

Multilingual Pronouns

In other languages, gender-neutral pronouns vary and different solutions are being trialed and pushed by LGBTQ+ communities. Added complications occur as romance languages are heavily gendered requiring gender agreements on adjectives.

In France, the most common practice is a combination of the feminine pronoun ‘elle’ and the masculine pronoun ‘il’ resulting in ‘iel’. In written Spanish, gender agreements such as an @ combining the masculine agreement ‘o’ and the feminine agreement ‘a’ are being used. Others preference ‘x’ as a non-explicit form. However, it is not clear or obvious of the pronunciation when spoken.

Linguistic Challenges

Changing grammar structures of language is never going to be easy. Language consists of deeply ingrained systems that have existed for hundreds of thousands of years. However, progress is happening. The most important part of this process is to remain educated and educate others to embrace diversity, show solidarity and create a world where everyone feels seen.

Love

Team Nonchalant x

Ellie Hudspith