Here’s something most of us never got taught in sex ed: lesbians can get STIs.
If that sounds obvious to you, brilliant. But for a lot of queer women, the message they’ve absorbed – from school, from friends, from the internet, sometimes from actual healthcare professionals – is that sex between women is basically risk-free. No penis, no problem.
That’s not true. And the fact that so few of us know it is creating a real gap in how we look after ourselves and each other.
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This isn’t a scare piece. The risk profile for women who have sex with women is genuinely different from heterosexual sex – for some infections, the risk is lower. But “lower” isn’t “zero,” and for a few things (bacterial vaginosis, we’re looking at you), the risk is actually higher. Let’s get into it.
Skip to:
- How STIs actually spread between women
- Which STIs should you actually know about?
- How to protect yourself
- Getting tested
- Where to get tested and find support
How STIs actually spread between women
The reason the “no penis, no risk” myth has stuck is that a lot of STI education is built around penetrative heterosexual sex. Condoms get all the airtime. Everything else gets ignored.
But STIs don’t care about the gender of the people involved. They care about how bodies make contact. And in sex between women, there’s plenty of contact to go around.
STIs can be transmitted between women through:
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Oral sex – your mouth on her vulva, or hers on yours. This is probably the most common route of transmission between women for infections like herpes (HSV-1 and HSV-2), HPV, and potentially syphilis and gonorrhoea.
Hands and fingers – digital penetration or touching each other’s genitals. If you touch your partner’s vulva and then your own (or vice versa), you can transfer vaginal fluids and any infections they carry. Research confirms that practices involving digital-vaginal contact present a plausible route for STI transmission between women.
Sharing sex toys – using a dildo, vibrator, or other toy on one partner and then the other without washing it or changing the condom. This is one of the most clearly documented routes of transmission between women.
Skin-to-skin genital contact – vulva-to-vulva contact (tribbing/scissoring) can transmit infections that spread through skin contact, including herpes, HPV, and genital warts.
Oral-anal contact (rimming) – can transmit infections including hepatitis A, herpes, and intestinal parasites.
The CDC’s guidelines on women who have sex with women confirm that the risk of STI transmission depends on the specific infection and the sexual practices involved. Some infections transmit more easily between women than others – but the blanket assumption that queer women are exempt is wrong.
Which STIs should you actually know about?
Not all STIs carry the same risk between women. Here’s what the research says about the ones that matter most.
Bacterial vaginosis (BV)
This is the big one, and it often gets overlooked because BV isn’t technically classified as an STI. But it absolutely can be passed between female partners, and research shows that lesbians are 2.5 times more likely to have BV than heterosexual women. Studies have found BV prevalence rates of 24-51% among lesbians, compared to around 9-14% in the general female population. In monogamous lesbian couples where one partner had BV, around 73% of their partners had it too.
BV shows up as unusual discharge, a fishy smell, or sometimes no symptoms at all. It’s treatable with antibiotics, but if you keep getting it, your partner may need treatment too.
Herpes (HSV-1 and HSV-2)
Herpes spreads through skin-to-skin contact and oral sex – both very common in sex between women. HSV-1 (typically oral herpes) can be transmitted to the genitals through oral sex, and the CDC notes that the relatively frequent practice of oral sex among women who have sex with women may place them at higher risk for genital HSV-1 infection. You can have herpes without ever showing symptoms and still pass it on.
HPV (human papillomavirus)
We covered this in detail in our guide to smear tests for queer women, but the short version: HPV spreads through skin-to-skin contact and has been found in women who have never had sex with men. It’s the virus behind almost all cervical cancers, which is why screening matters regardless of who you sleep with.
Chlamydia and gonorrhoea
These are less commonly transmitted between women than through heterosexual sex, but it’s not impossible. Around 3-5% of lesbians surveyed reported having been diagnosed with chlamydia at some point. The risk increases if you also have sex with men, or if your partner does – and it’s worth remembering that the majority of women who have sex with women (53-97%) have also had sex with men at some point.
Trichomoniasis
Trich is a parasitic infection that can be passed between female partners. The CDC confirms that direct transmission of trichomoniasis between women has been documented, and prevalence rates among women who have sex with women are actually higher than for chlamydia or gonorrhoea.
HIV
The risk of HIV transmission between women through sex is very low, but it’s not zero. There are documented cases of sexual transmission of HIV between women, confirmed through genetic testing of the virus. The risk increases if blood is present during menstruation or if there are cuts or sores.
Syphilis
Rare between women, but sexual transmission between female partners has been reported. Worth being aware of, especially if you or your partners also have sex with men.
How to protect yourself
Let’s be honest: almost nobody uses dental dams. Research suggests that fewer than 10% of women who have sex with women have ever used one, and only about 2% use them regularly. So while we’re going to tell you they exist and they work, we’re also going to be realistic about what safer sex actually looks like for most queer women.
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The barriers (the ones that actually exist)
Dental dams – thin sheets of latex or polyurethane you place over the vulva or anus during oral sex. They work. Almost nobody uses them. If you want to try them, they’re available online and at some sexual health clinics. You can also make one from a condom by cutting off the tip and the base and cutting along one side to make a flat rectangle.
Gloves – latex or nitrile gloves for hand sex. More practical than dental dams, and actually quite useful if either of you has cuts, hangnails, or rough skin on your hands. They also make clean-up easier. Some people find them unsexy. Other people find them very sexy. Your call.
Condoms on sex toys – put a condom on shared toys and change it between partners or between body parts. This is probably the single most practical safer sex measure for queer women, and the NHS recommends it.
You may also like: Are sex toys for everyone? A woman’s guide
The practical stuff (what most people actually do)
Wash your hands before and after sex. Basic, but it matters, especially for preventing BV and reducing the general transfer of bacteria.
Wash sex toys between uses. Soap and warm water between partners, and between switching from anal to vaginal use. If you’re sharing toys mid-session, condoms are the most reliable option.
Don’t share towels or razors during or after sex if either of you has any cuts or sores.
Avoid oral sex if you have cold sores or mouth ulcers, or if your partner has visible sores or an active outbreak of herpes. Easier said than done in the moment, but worth keeping in mind.
Trim your nails. Not just for comfort (though that too) – small cuts and tears in vaginal or anal tissue create entry points for infections.
Get the HPV vaccine if you haven’t already. In the UK it’s free on the NHS for people up to 25, and it protects against the strains of HPV most likely to cause cervical cancer and genital warts.
The conversation
The most effective safer sex tool is also the most awkward one: talking about it. Asking a new partner when they were last tested, whether they have any current infections, and what their sexual health practices are isn’t exactly pillow talk, but it matters.
Less than a quarter of lesbians surveyed in one major study reported worrying about contracting STIs – not because the risk is zero, but because nobody ever told them there was a risk at all. If we’re not thinking about it, we’re definitely not talking about it. And that’s how things get passed on.
Have the conversation. It gets less awkward every time.
Getting tested
One of the biggest issues in lesbian sexual health isn’t the infections themselves – it’s the fact that so many of us aren’t getting tested. If you believe you’re not at risk, you don’t go to the clinic. And if you don’t go to the clinic, you don’t catch things early.
You deserved better sex education. Your GP should know that your sexual health needs exist. The system should work for you. In the meantime, the best thing you can do is know the facts, get tested, and talk to your partners.
And if you haven’t already, go and read our guide to cervical screening for queer women. Because that’s the other half of this picture.
Where to get tested and find support
UK
- NHS Sexual Health Services – find a free clinic near you
- SH:24 – free postal STI testing kits (England and Wales)
- LGBT Foundation – LGBTQ+-friendly healthcare services and sexual health support
- Terrence Higgins Trust – sexual health information, testing, and support
US
- Planned Parenthood – STI testing at clinics nationwide, often on a sliding fee scale
- CDC STI Treatment Guidelines – Women Who Have Sex With Women – clinical guidance (useful to show your doctor if needed)
- National LGBT Cancer Network – LGBTQ+-specific health resources
Australia
- ACON Health – LGBTQ+ sexual health services and testing
- Sexual Health Quarters (SHQ) – an inclusive sexual health clinic in Western Australia
- Better Health Channel – Sexual Health for LGBTIQ+ People – Victorian government health information
This article contains general health information and is not a substitute for professional medical advice. If you have specific concerns about your sexual health, please speak to your GP, a sexual health clinic, or a qualified healthcare provider.
Nonchalant x
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This article was written by one of our creative team writers here at Nonchalant Magazine.
